An Excellent Woman

During the month of August, I am re-sharing some of my most read blog posts. This one is about my partner, my friend, my wife, Shawna. Since today is her birthday, I figured it was a good opportunity to share again!

A Second Time Paul

“If you want to keep your family together you better get some help.”  Those words were spoken to me by my wife, Shawna, eight and a half years ago.  You see, I had messed up.  Royally.  I was losing my battle with alcoholism and decided it was time to let her know everything.  So I packed a bag, sat her down, told her all the terrible details, and watched as she surprised me: she left.

But the next morning she came back.

A year and a half later, she found out that I was still losing that same battle, only now it resulted in me losing my job as a minister.  Her response was to call some married friends who had been through the same struggle and ask if we could spend a few days with them.  Those friends said yes, and we started (again) on a long road to…

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I Am White Privilege

For the next four weeks, I will be re-sharing some of my most read blog posts. This one developed out of the literature and research I was exposed to in my degree program, as well as observations I made (mostly within church culture). It is the first of five posts on the topic.

A Second Time Paul

I am white privilege.

I may not wish to acknowledge it, but the fact remains.

I have opportunities available to me simply because I am a member of the dominant race in my particular culture.

I can always find opportunities to be in groups of people of my race.

I can be fairly certain that when I need to move, I will find affordable housing in a neighborhood where I feel comfortable.

I can expect that the curriculum my children will be exposed to (and that I grew up with) will largely tell stories of people of our race.

I can be hired by an affirmative action employer without people accusing me of getting the job because I am white.

I have been able to avoid certain uncomfortable situations simply because I am a member of the dominant race in my particular culture.

I can go shopping without having people…

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No More Porn

For the next four weeks, I will be re-sharing some of my most read blog posts. This one was inspired by the high school students from my church. May God bless us all.

A Second Time Paul

Let me start by saying I was recently guilty of the behavior I am going to address in this post. More on that later.

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Several months ago, I attended a Man Retreat. It was a weekend devoted to answering the question, “What does it mean to be a man of God?” I was one of a handful of adult chaperones (which, in hindsight, sounds kind of ridiculous!). Although I have written about that weekend before, I want to bring up one of the topics that was discussed once again.

It is time to say, “No more porn.” As we had times of open discussion, the young men in my group talked about how much they hate pornography—the entire industry. Yes! 14-18 year old young men HATE what pornography is doing. They hate the accessibility. They hate the prevalence. They hate how it objectifies women. They hate to think…

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